If there's one thing I know...

the noblest adventure is "doing the work" to live a life you love the hell out of


Loving your damn life comes down to answering 2 questions:

  1. Regardless of the past & present, who the hell do I want to be? And,
  2. What does that version of me actually want?

And then radically committing to taking actions to become and have.

Be. Do. Have.

i have a decade+ helping women answer those 2 questions so they can take action to love their damn lives faster

But I also know...

Hi! I'm Jen Vertanen and I'm thrilled you're here!

If I've learned one thing since 2015 and doing my own work to rebuild myself it's this: life is so much better - even in the shitty moments - when you deeply know and hella respect who you are and give yourself what you need to live a fulfilling life.

I created The SELF Approach™ in 2023 after a decade+ working with women around worthiness + enoughness (or the flip-side, feeling too-muchness which is totally not a thing...you are never too much) AND my own journey from loneliness and self-loathing to deeply loving the hell out of myself and my life.

I intimately know the profound difference loving ourselves TOO (in addition to everyone else we love) has in every aspect of our lives, including our future.

I blend a myriad of skills together from corporate project manager to certified life coach to beentheredonethat to help women do the work so they can live and love the hell out of themselves and their lives.

This website is full of lessons learned, practical tools you actually want to use, perspective shifts, pep talks, lightbulb ahas, camaraderie, and the deep belief that loving yourself and your life is possible no matter what

That perfect storm? Trying to "fix my life" by blowing up my world and almost walking away from my marriage and the one person who'd always had my back and supported me no matter what and an email from my mom sweeping alllll the years of abuse under the rug.

I was left gutted. Broken. No longer able to trust myself and my decision-making or "confidence". Questioning EVERYTHING I'd carried with me since childhood.

My rock bottom was realizing I was no longer willing to be a shell of myself, going through the motions, and getting by with slapping a smile on my face and pretending everything was "fine"..

...and that what needed to change was me.

My relationship with myself. Rebuilding myself and my life from the inside out. Mending my marriage. Taking full responsibility for my happiness, fulfillment, contentment, etc.

It was time to "do the work".

I hit my personal rock bottom in 2015 when a perfect storm left me feeling broken & questioning everything

It's years later and I no longer question if this is all there ever is or when is it my time to have the life I want...loving myself is just who I am now

And I want this for as many women as possible

If you’re reading this and thinking, “That’s great but it's not going to work for me..."

I've coached many women just like me who checked all the boxes and had a fairly envious life but went to bed each night wondering "Is this really all there ever is? I worked so hard for...this? When is it going to be my turn? Who the hell even am I anymore and what the hell do I want?"

does it take some radical honesty & "doing the work" to answer the questions? Absolutely. but that's where i come in. i help you do it faster while actually enjoying the process

Now it's my mission...

Helping women create the future they WANT and fall in love with themselves and their lives...all without burning it all down...

because wherever you go, there you are.

Imagine a world of people (especially women!) fully engaged in their lives and sharing their gifts with the world all while getting their own needs met too.

Talk about a ginormous middle finger to a world that profits from our pain instead of our joy & fulfillment.

I live in the Twin Cities (Minneapolis/St. Paul), MN with my husband and our 2 drooly newfoundlands (we're officially empty nesters after raising babies for 33 years!)

I thrive on new experiences, anything that gets my adrenaline pumpin', and extra, extra love a super dry red 🍷.

I did my own work to heal my ish and am now living MY version of a life I love the hell out of.

I will never be done growing + learning and my personal mission is keeping 80-yo future me hella proud because hoo-boy can she be a feisty, spicy one! (hint...when we work together, we start by creating a super detailed vision of your 80-yo self!)

You could say I'm slightly obsessed when it comes to women loving the hell out of themselves & intentionally creating their futures

Current obsessions: Extra dry red wine, anything created by Taylor Sheridan, finding the perfect shade of red, smashing the patriarchy, Kindle Unlimited, & the word "fuck"

Around here...

We unapologetically own our shit & do the work to heal

We are our own damn heroes

We are pro-aging & don't take the luxury & privilege of time lightly

We live in the both/and and hold space for nuances and complexities

We own our privilege

We have a strong bias for action

Ego doesn’t drive the bus…at least not all of the time

Life is a grand adventure and we stay in relentless pursuit of a life well lived and loved

So welcome. Settle in, get cozy, poke around, and I can't wait to hear what becomes possible when you're intentionally creating the future YOU want starting TODAY!

Official bio

Jen Vertanen is a Life Design Coach for women who wonder if this is really all there ever is and has been helping women for a decade+ fall in love with themselves and their lives by intentionally creating the future they want instead of leaving it to chance.

Jen has been on the frontlines with her own personal transformation (from loneliness and self-loathing to not only loving, but liking herself and her life) as well as the thousands of lives she’s helped through coaching and podcasting which led her to develop The SELF Approach™.

Using her signature candor, humor, and unique approach to "doing the work", Jen wants the world to know it’s never too late but you do kind of need to get going.

When she’s not coaching or thinking up new exercises for clients, you can find Jen unwinding at the end of the day bingeing anything Taylor Sheridan with her hubby and newfs in Saint Paul, MN.

Website: jenvertanen.com
Instagram: instagram.com/_loveyourdamnlife

Check out all my podcast interviews here...I'm an engaging guest and not afraid to go there (which happens to be the name of my first podcast)

As heard on

I deeply believe in living a life full of joy, safety, love, connection, belonging, etc and take my responsibility in creating that for myself very seriously

I love vintage Aquaman and 🌶️🌶️🌶️ smut and you already know my love for an extra dry red

I listen to Encanto, Les Misérables and Moana on repeat and still get the words wrong

I identify as queer (pan if we're being exact) in a cishet marriage with a dude (Mr. V. aka my Batman) I love deeply

I am neurodiverse (ADHD) and love learning how to partner with my big, beautiful brain. It's an obsession really, lol

I have an aversion to toxic positivity, love & light, positive/high vibes only. You can miss me with that harmful, gaslight-y bullshit

I don't take for granted the privilege I have as a straight-passing, middle-aged, white women from a middle-class background. I have my own shit but don't have to worry about my safety, putting food on the table, being pulled over by the cops, or getting my needs met

Random tidbits

A transformational life coach for women who know they can live a life they love waking up to and are ready to do the work to make it happen

© 2023 Jen Vertanen & Love Your Damn Life

An ADHD &  LGBTQ+  woman owned business